Perhaps it’s my naturally self-critical personality that causes me to think that I’m not doing as well as I feel I should be doing. 2016 had a TON of setbacks, disappointments, and moments of uncertainty. I remember this time last year, I was a fresh college graduate with a lot of hopes and expectations for my future and the course of this year has really helped bring me down to earth. It’s not that I’ve given up on my of aspirations, I’ve just become more realistic with my expectations.
I’ve always wondered what life would be like after graduating from college. While I’ve always been prepared for uncertainty, I never could have foreseen how tumultuous this year would be. I bounced around a lot of jobs and took on many different opportunities that all taught me incredibly valuable lessons.
Life, for the most part, has been incredibly messy; let’s be real here.
I don’t think any amount of sobering pep talks and mental preparation could ever prepare you for what post-grad life would be like. It’s incredibly lonely and you ask yourself “am I doing the right thing?” more often than you should. Many times, I felt like the rug was constantly being pulled underneath me. Whenever I got comfortable with a situation, God kept throwing me into a new direction. I rarely ever felt like I had much time to breathe which I don’t think is necessarily a bad thing- I’ve learned to think on my feet and trust my intuitions.
I felt like every 3 months life thrusted me into a new direction. At the beginning of the year, I was interning at a high end fashion company. After my internship was over, I spent a few months juggling 2 part time jobs just working hard to make enough to survive. Then I landed a job working for a small LDA firm while moonlighting as the Chief Marketing Officer for one of the subsidiaries. After I realized that wasn’t for me, I ended up landing a full-time temp job working at an AMAZING clothing brand which I love whole-heartedly.
My 3 month contract is about to expire soon and I don’t know if I’ll continue on or if I’ll be let go. But in the event that I do move on, it’s just another sign that I’m not yet where I need to be. The uncertainty still scares me. While all of my friends are finally securing their full-time jobs and beginning their careers; I feel like I’m still being tossed around, not able to settle into life the way.
It’s easy to be discouraged by a lot of unexpected changes, but it just goes to show that there’s a ton of opportunities out there. It’s as exciting as it is scary. But looking back at my accomplishments, I can look forward to 2017 as another year chock full of lessons.
At the end of last year, I began a new chapter moving back to LA from Riverside. Since moving back, I had the opportunity to intern at a high end fashion company, attend LA Fashion Week, work multiple jobs and gain a ton of experiences, and really let my passion for social justice fly.
Exactly 1 year later, I’ve taken the opportunity to move out of my family’s home into a bomb house with new friends. I’ve started another year with another fresh start! I’m scared, yes. But holy shit am I excited to see where this new year will take me.